The Relationship Page|
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The Relationship PageHow We MetI first saw Paris Holidayinn, my now girlfriend—and the best girlfriend one could ever have in the entire world—at the book depository in Dallas, Texas (you know, the place where Abraham Lincoln was shot). It was surely fate, because Paris lives all the way out in Athens, Georgia, which is where I live too, but we were both in Dallas at the same time. I was on my way to see the assassination museum; Paris was on her way out—the long way, via the roof. That's how I spotted her. It was love at first site. And for Paris, seeing me meant that she didn't jump. Life has been great for her ever since. |
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I'd never had a girlfriend before, not a real one, and my friends didn't like it. They all think Paris Holidayinn is superhot, but they don't think we make a good couple. I think they're jealous. Paris agrees.
Paris and I have traveled all around the world together. I don't much care for planes, but Paris gets me through the travel A-okay because a plane trip with Paris is like a plane trip with the best, most wonderful, most super incredible person in the whole world. You can't beat that.
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Here we are in France. We were intending to go to Paris's namesake, but we took the wrong train and ended up in Lyon. That was okay, though, because it meant we got to hang out at this fountain. |
Here are pictures of three other famous sites we have visited: the Taj Majal (left, at the west wall); Big Ben (center, at the north wall); and the Alamo (right, at the south wall).
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DangerOne of the things that Paris likes so much about me is how I protect her from any trouble that might come her way. This in turn allows her to travel anywhere she wants. Here I am defending her from piranhas on the Arkansas River. |
DanceI love Paris Holidayinn so much. Here I am dancing with another gal—see how miserable Paris looks. Never again, Paris, I promise. (The girl asked me—what could I do? No doubt, she was jealous of my girlfriend.) |
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HospitalI told Paris about a book I was reading on the influenza outbreak of 1918, about the six hundred thousand Americans who died and the huge death rates in some communities. Paris was horrified, as was I. Smart, forward-thinking woman that she is, she insisted we tour Athens's own Regional Medical Center (i.e., the hospital) to find out more about the place we might end up if Spanish flu were ever to return and what it is we can do in the meantime.
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FlickerParis and I both enjoy the Flicker Theater and Bar more than any other drinking establishment here in Athens. Here we are hanging out outside at happy hour, enjoying a few livations. That air conditioning really comes in handy on hot summer days, especially since neither Paris nor I run our air conditioning at home (though admittedly Paris does use a fan). Why pay for it when a business is willing to give you it for free?
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Hanging Out with the Neighbor, Mr. HandEven though we're in love and all, Paris and I do spend a little time with other people. We're not weird, after all. One of our favorite people to hang out with is my neighbor, Mr. Hand. Mr. Hand has lived next door to me every year of my life, believe it or not. We're great pals by now. There's no shortage of conversation when Mr. Hand is around. |
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Dress ShoppingI was never a fan of shopping until I met Paris Holidayinn. Now, every shopping experience is like watching the most beautiful woman in the world reinvent herself. Here's Paris in her new dress! I love the color, Paris. Very classy and feminine. Not that I'm against lavender, but pink looks ravishing on you. Arf! Arf! |
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